Playlist
Heart Cooks Brain
Playlist
Heart Cooks Brain

The years go fast but the days go so slow The years go fast but the days go so slow

We need to find ways to escape time. This playlist is an accompaniment for that journey, welcoming the disorientating qualities that time offers and surrendering to their flow.

Back in March as the world continued to change, when there was no more commute, less and less free time, and more overwhelming anxiety than ever—I realized that the role that music had always played in my life for so long was no longer really there. Even worse—I may not have been even actually enjoying it*.

So I needed to find a new way to make music fun for me, and in doing so, to salvage my sanity. For so long, the enjoyment I derived from music lived in the idea of discovery. Problem with that though is, when the stuff you discover becomes stuff you also love, it becomes a part of the fixed-rotation and then there’s less room to welcome the unexpected. And really, my daily habits started to highlight how stale* my listening had become.

I realized I was really only putting things on that didn’t have any risk for my enjoyment, with no "time" or energy for much more. But this removed the element of music I may love the most—discovery. So I started to create playlists, beginning with a simple, personal premise: to go back to my records and library and rediscover/revisit music that I love but don’t frequent, add in what new music is exciting me, and combine that with an attempt to organize my emotional flow throughout the period of time. The result being sequenced short-to-long playlists full of tunes that felt like they captured my own emotional journey as we all together watch our world fall apart.

They’re also a document of the idea of the passing of time and the support that music offers me on that journey. Their time-capsuling nature, defining a moment within of a period of time to hopefully never be experienced again, felt important to me, for me. And as things dragged on and some forms of comfort returned, so did the the optimism, hope, positivity, energy, passion that had otherwise felt fleeting at times. So to "celebrate" that, along with putting this website into the world, I started to work on another playlist that could replicate where I am today with the same thesis as the others. None of this has been some grandiose undertaking or self important journey—but it has felt like a simple way to acknowledge *these times* through one of the most important things in my life: music

And unlike many of those playlists, I didn’t make this one only for myself. I made it pointed directly at those that I love, care about and value, those who even *have to* exist with me; sharing with them the confidence and acceptance and joy and love that I find at this point. Time is a fucked up thing, but I’ve stopped dwelling on its passing and the untenable notion of trying to enjoy every minute of it—instead working on just being in the flow, making the best of it however I can. No pressure to make each minute matter if most of them already do. <3

*The Grateful Dead are home base. They are an impenetrable part of my permanent collection, helping me to make sense of all things always. They are also an outlet for constant discovery, as making your way through all of their recorded history would take the better part of a lifetime. So they are exempt from this feeling, but I acknowledge that they absolutely did contribute to the results of how limited my listening ended up feeling.